Hey. Private eyes. They’re watching you… And you asked for it. No, this doesn’t have anything to do with conspiracy theories, Big Brother, Joseph Stalin and the Communists or the novel 1984 by the brilliant George Orwell. It has everything to do with a website you’re consciously signed up for and advertised your life on…

Everyone seems to wish to become a larger than life reality TV star on Facebook. No one seems to care that their private lives are on display, like a circus for all to see. Are you trying to create your own gossip website about yourself, people? Seriously. It looks like it by all of the crazy statuses you’re posting about yourself.

“O.M.G. I am sooo mad @ him he is making me soo mad i hate himm”

“i am tired of everyone being jerks! u all kno who u r!” (This oddball may also even post the names of people upsetting them.)

“i love this girl soo much she is my world” Blah blah, include a lot more romantic details and such…

And let’s point the big, fat white elephant out in the room here. All of the stupid pictures of yourself drinking and looking like a fool are not flattering. Who do you think you are? Kim Kardashian? P Diddy? Do you think you are glamorous or cool by doing this? (They’re not people to emulate, by the way.)

Service - Charlotte '08 National Youth Fine Arts

We seem to have an attention hog generation, whose addiction is promoting their entire lives to the world. It’s as if they are on their own stage, not even caring who knows every detail about their lives. Generations before us seemed to understand that creating your own rumors was a dumb idea… We humans thrive on gossip and seeing the demise of others when we often feel terrible about our own lives. That’s not an idealistic concept to assume such things but it is the truth.


(Great Grandma Sandra and my Grandpa)

A few weeks ago, my Sicilian Grandpa gave me some advice about being private – for your own good. His mother, Sandra, who emigrated from Sicily to America when she was in her 20s, told him that: “You shouldn’t tell everyone about everything that is happening in your life.” He continued with what else she told him, saying, “They may act like they care when they ask you what you’re doing, but as soon as they’ll listen to you, they’ll turn around and use what you told them against you. You can’t trust everyone.”

And believe me, a full blooded Sicilian would know the meaning of trust… And betrayal. Don’t believe me?


Two words: The Godfather. Sometimes I wonder if Don Corleone was an influence on my Grandpa. Anyway, I digress… Really, people don’t change. Even if my grandma gave that advice to my grandpa 60 years ago (Before Facebook, computers and even LCD alarm clocks), it still stands today. People don’t change much.

It’s not to say you should go live in a cave and not share anything about your life with anyone… I have a Facebook account also, to keep in touch with family and friends easily and make new friends. But you have to be careful about what you share. Some say you shouldn’t have anything to hide about your life, which is true, but your most intimate thoughts should not be broadcasted on the internet for the world to see. (It’s called a journal, people).

I mean even when I was 9 years old, journals were being sold that had LOCKS on them. Now instead of locking away their most sincere ponderings of the heart in a lock and key journal, kids are now broadcoasting every whiff of the mind on the internet!

Nobody thinks that Facebook is almost like Big Brother – or private eyes. When you’re on Facebook, you should act like theres spies on the lose trying to convict you of everything. I mean, I prefer to call them Facebook creepers. They are private eyes, and they’re watching you.. Hmm. They see your every move… Watching your every move….. Hmm, I feel a song coming on!! (Surprising.)

Thank you, Hall and Oates, for practically writing the Facebook theme song in the 80s. You may have trumped Nostradomus on this one!

But, okay, the point being, any time you’re about to publicly insult your ex, or complain about how bad your mom and dad are for not letting you go see some gruesome movie – or you’re just plain ticked and feel like ranting on about anyone you please, or posting those foolish pictures of you being drunk and/or insane looking.. Remember … Private eyes, they’re watchin’ you!